wildernesstales: (TF)
[personal profile] wildernesstales

Rating: PG-13
Series: G1
Pairings: Sideswipe/Ratchet/Sunstreaker
Summary: After the Decepticons attacked Autobot City, Sideswipe and Sunstreaker struggle to reconcile their feelings
Warnings: Established character death
Disclaimer: As per usual, the good things in life are not mine to have, but belong to someone else... in this case Hasbro, Takara and IDW and anyone else I’ve forgotten…
Authors Notes: Written for the [livejournal.com profile] twins_x_ratch October Challenge, Week 1.  Prompt was Adam Lambert’s song Time for Miracles. I was at work when I started this, so I couldn’t listen to the song, just read the lyrics.  It’s probably quite an upbeat song…  This fic?  Isn’t.
Feedback makes friends.  Flames dealt with by the masters of paranoia and fire, Red Alert and Inferno.

Sideswipe lay awake, staring at the ruined ceiling of their quarters.  He couldn’t bear to leave them.  Couldn’t bear to leave the memories.  But he couldn’t recharge here, not with the memories of what he had lost.  The pain filled him completely, leaving little room for anything else.  Sometimes, Sideswipe thought he could deactivate from the pain alone.

Beside him, Sunstreaker turned over, cuddling closer to his brother.
“Can’t sleep either?” He murmured softly.
“I keep thinking about him.” Sideswipe answered, venting a sigh.  “I can’t stop thinking about him.”
“Me either.”
“It hurts.” Sideswipe whined and Sunstreaker shifted so he could pull his brother into a rough hug.
“Do you remember the way he used to smile when you’d been caught pranking?” He asked, trying to distract Sideswipe.
“That little smile?”
“Yeah, the one that was ‘I’m angry with you for pranking, but I have to admit it was a good prank’.”
“I miss that smile.” Sideswipe’s voice was soft, but in the quiet of their quarters, it sounded so very loud.
“Me too.” So much for distracting Sideswipe.

Sunstreaker hated this.  Hated the pain.  He didn’t want to live if it meant living without Ratchet.  And he knew that Sideswipe felt the same.  Yet they were still here.  They hadn’t faded like all the medical textbooks thought they should.  First Aid wasn’t sure why, but he reasoned it may have something to do with them being twins, and their split spark could sustain them even with the loss of its bonded spark.

Sideswipe had been on Earth when it happened.  He could barely remember the battle, just the pain.  Sunstreaker had travelled from Cybertron with Optimus Prime, arriving near the end of the siege.  The battle won, they found one another and looked for Ratchet.  The medbay had been empty of his presence, First Aid giving them an unaccountably soft look before he ushered them into Ratchet’s office to tell them the news.

Sunstreaker’s vents hitched in a sob.  He scraped his fingers against his plating, trying to distract himself, only to feel Sideswipe’s fingers closing over his own, stopping him.  They curled up together on a berth that seemed far too large for just the two of them and held each other, each remember their medic.  Each remembering their lover.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~


“You know what worries me the most?” Sideswipe asked brokenly.
“What?” Sunstreaker thought he already knew the answer to Sideswipe’s question.  It was probably the same thing that was worrying him.
“My spark doesn’t hurt the way I thought it would.” Sideswipe paused, unconsciously bringing his hand up to rub at his chestplating.  “I don’t feel like I’m fading or anything.”
“It doesn’t feel like it for me either.” He admitted.  “Do you think…?” He didn’t want to finish the question.  Didn’t want to ask whether there could be any hope.  They hadn’t seen Ratchet’s frame since they found it in the crashed shuttle.
“We have to know.” Sideswipe said, sitting up and running a hand across his face.  “We have to know if what we’re feeling is right.”

Sunstreaker swung his legs over the edge of the berth, feeling more than a little nervous about what they were about to do.  It was all well and good thinking about it, but actually finding out whether it was possible?  Far scarier than facing Megatron alone and weaponless.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~


Autobot City was quiet, the darkness almost comforting in some strange way.  They made their way to the temporary mausoleum, lingering at the doorway.  They had to know, but at the same time, neither of them wanted to be the one to make the first step.
“Together?” Sunstreaker held out his hand.
“Always together.” Sideswipe nodded, and together they entered the darkened room.  Greyed chassis lay on berths, ready for interment when the time was right; Prime, Ironhide, Prowl… Ratchet.

They stood at the edge of his berth, looking down at his frame.  His injuries had been repaired, and he almost looked like he was recharging.  If it wasn’t for the color of his frame.

“Sideswipe…” Sunstreaker’s voice sounded strained, and Sideswipe broke off his contemplation of what he used to love doing to Ratchet’s chevron to look at his brother.
“What?”
“He’s not grey.”
“What?” Sunstreaker pointed to Ratchet’s frame.  It was dull and greying, certainly.  But not completely grey.  Here and there, white patches still showed.
“Could it be…?” Sideswipe’s hands shook as he reached for Ratchet’s chest plating.


In the darkness, a weak blue light flickered.



Authors Notes Redux: Okay, so I didn’t want to leave the fic on a sad note.  I still refuse to believe the movie happened.  I had to give them some hope.


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Tales from the Wilderness

May 2022

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